Famous Quotes from ...

Elayne Boosler



    I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three.

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    I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something's wrong with me.

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    When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. It's a whole different way of thinking.

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    You never see a man walking down the street with a woman who has a little potbelly and a bald spot

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